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I went to a party I will never forget.
I think that Vic and Seb are alike; or is that Seb and Tina?
Anything like a reality check to kill a fantasy? I think of Seb and Tina and I was back in bed and it was Seb who was working me over. He was doing all the right things. He sucked and munched my nipples (a little too hard if the truth be known, but I've stopped trying to correct him) and lapped away at my clit as if it was the sweetest honey that he'd ever tasted, but it was not the same as it was before; before I knew how much I want to kiss Victoria and have her make love to me.
I reflect that Seb is no longer enough for me. I reflect as I type this that that is the real danger of having an affair. On some level it's an admission that your Partner is just no longer good enough for you. Vic says that she's going to teach me how it feels to have my pussy eaten by a real woman. I can't get that promise out of my mind. I want it even if we don't do anything more than that. I want to know what it feels like to be really well taken care of. I wonder if I should ask her if she thinks that it would be a good idea to have Seb watch us. He might like the girl-on-girl action; and wouldn't that make it not having an affair if he were there with us? I want to know what a dildo up my ass feels like. I expect to be disappointed, but I still want to try.
Wait a minute! I've been posting here for three days now. Vic knows about my online identity! She may see this someday and know that it is I who wrote about us! I suppose it doesn't matter. Without having her make love to me, I'm dead anyway. What a confession! Yet, even as I type this I know that I'm not going to suppress this. I'm going to bate fate and post it. Damn fate! I can always say that it was a joke can't I? Well, I could say that if I delete these last two lines, but I know that I won't.
Seb is calling me back to bed. I have to go. Good night, my Love.
Posted by Cinner @ 1:15 a.m. 28 Comments Labels: striptease, Links to this post
Saturday, 26 August 2012
I had lunch with Vic and Tina and the others today at Sovereign. It was awkward. I couldn't look at Vic, and Tina noticed, I'm sure. She probably thinks that I'm upset because they didn't come by the house last night for drinks when we invited them. I missed them, yes, but how much can you miss someone when surrounded by 50 of your Partner's closest friends? Tina wanted to buy me a scarf to make it up to me. I declined and she got miffed as if I had hurt her somehow by not accepting her peace offering. It was not necessary, but I took the scarf. It is beautiful. It reminds me of the metallic threaded scarf that Vic wore to the opening at the Mutual Gallery in May. She was beautiful! At the time I noticed, but didn't if you know what I mean. When I'm sleeping naked with it tonight, Seb is probably going to think that it's the kinkiest thing that he's seen in years. I need to find my diaphragm.
Posted by Cinner @ 4:42 p.m. 16 Comments Labels: Links to this post
Friday, 25 August 2012
I could not sleep last night and I haven't been able to concentrate today. It was that kiss. It wasn't a peck on the cheek or even an innocent kiss on the lips. She was hungry and so was I, it seems. She was pulling my tongue into her mouth and my body on to hers. She nearly tore my blouse! I didn't care! What I need more than anything now though is to understand what's happening with me. I need to understand why I can't stop thinking about her. I had never felt so alive! I need to understand why incest is wrong. Seriously, I need to know that it is more than just canalization in a social psychological sense. I know that some people groups don't frown on it, and even King Tut married his sister, so why does Judeo-Christian tradition say that we can't love who we want to.
Hell! LOVE!!! That's a four-letter word if I ever heard one! Do I love Vic? She is exciting and she's offering me a chance to explore